Vroom vroom

I like things to be clean - very clean. I used to clean my car once a week. Vacuum twice a day. Wipe down the bathroom once a day. Dishes done after every meal. I still lost things as I tend to be rather absent minded, but they were lost in a clean environment. I have had to let this go since I started living with DH. It has been a struggle.

He is not messy per se. He is just very male. (I beg forgiveness from all the neat and tidy males out there. The two of you have my deepest apologies.) I bring this up not to chastise him. He is darling in many, many ways. It is instead because of the experience I just had cleaning the car.

Leather was conditioned. Metal was polished. Q-tips had been used to clean the vents and knobs. All that was left to do was vacuum. Normally, I prefer to vacuum before the detail cleaning, but I was willing to wait as DH was cleaning the Jeep and wanted to vacuum it too. I never stand in the way of a man cleaning. So I waited.

Pup was hiding in the floorboard of the car. She hates the vacuum. She once fit herself on a three inch windowsill between the curtain and the glass trying to hide from the satanic machine that was sucking up all of her morning stick chewing paraphernalia. The devil machine being outside instead of in the house was really messing with her. Maybe I shouldn't have tried to avoid brushing her by sucking up all her loose fur that one time. I think it scarred her.

DH finished and went off to get his fishing rods ready or some such nonsense leaving me with the vacuum. There was a funny grinding noise when I turned it on, and it smelled slightly like it was on fire. I didn't see any smoke, so I kept vacuuming. The noise got louder. The smell got stronger. Pup ran away.

I flipped the little red switch and tumped the vacuum upside down to see what all the ruckus was about. Belts looked good. No sticks stuck. The side gear looked a little funny.....so I poked at it with my finger.

I have no fingerprint on that finger anymore. Burned it clear off -nothing but shiny scar now. When I rob a jewelry store, that's the finger I'm going to use on the gun trigger. The vacuum had been spinning so fast that it melted the side gear. Melted it. The whole stinking tube part had welded itself onto the side and bottom. The brush bristles had glommed into the gear and tube.

I can't blame this on DH. I really wish I could though. If only I were okay with living in a mess....I would still have my fingerprint.

***I have never tried to vacuum my dog. I do not advocate vacuuming dogs. Dogs should be loved and cuddled and stuff. Did you hear that PETA? ***