Showing posts with label Czech. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Czech. Show all posts

Sunday, March 29, 2009

The taste of Czech

Saturday we woke up early and left the sketchy hotel. Our destination that morning was the town where DH's and M.’s great-great grandfather was born. It was a tiny little town at a crossroad with a population of about ten. We talked to three of them. I use the term talk loosely. My Czech is definitely functional, not conversational, and it’s not all that good. The whole experience was very surreal. Think about a kid packing up and leaving his country, going across the ocean to a land where he wouldn’t know the language or the people, knowing he probably would never see his family again. It takes guts. I have a new respect for my ancestors.

We toured the Pilsner Urquell brewery that afternoon. Learned a lot of technical mumbo-jumbo about beer, sampled beer straight from the barrel. Mostly though, we watched this guy who we later found out was a brewmaster from Seattle. There was a section of the tour where they show you the barley, water, and hops that they use to make the beer. There is a bucket of barley out so visitors can touch it and smell it. They have about ten tours a day, probably of about ten to twenty people each, all touching the barley.

The guy ate the barley.

I shudder to think about it even now. He probably has the plague.

We assumed our car roles, and we headed back to Prague. It was a true test of my navigating capabilities and M.’s Czech driving. The drivers were crazy, the map was terrible, and the three of us were exhausted. We were doing okay until Prague decided to put a parking ramp in the middle of the road and have all the lanes exit into the parking garage. Luckily for us, they gave five hours of free parking on the weekends.

The worst day

One day had to receive the honor of being the worst day of the trip. Thursday won. We woke up early, had breakfast, and toured the castle at Cesky Krumlov. The moat there is home to a huge brown bear. Learned that the answer to 'does a bear poop in the woods?' is no. He poops in a moat. We decided against photographic evidence.

We had developed set roles by this point in the trip. M. was not allowed to navigate as his attention was easily caught by tractors. Once while navigating, he looked up and asked why we were turning right. He hadn't noticed the signs. DH was not allowed to navigate or drive because he couldn't see out the windows. So M. drove, I navigated, and DH was in charge of snacks and naps.

We headed north to a spa town where we were going to get massages. We had been told it was full of Russians. I think this was code for overpriced, ugly, and not worth the trip. To quote M., "This town sucks." After trying five different hotels and finding them all full or WAY out of our budget or closed, we decided to head back to Plzen.

Now the map we were navigating with was not the most detailed of maps. It had major highways, bigger towns, and county lines. We had discovered that the term road was loosely applied. Some marked major highways were similarto our interstates back home. Some were more like our two lane highways. Then there were the roads that didn't make it to the map. A few had all three lines painted on them, but most did not. It seemed they took an asphalt truck and followed the cow trails. There were no shoulders. They planted trees next to the road- right next to the road. In a few places the road had been paved around the tree. Most of them could fit two cars side by side. This was not a concern for the drivers; they passed uphill-around a corner-in the rain with abandon. We call this "feeling Czech".

We drove around Plzen searching for a hotel or wireless signal. We were not successful. M. and I left DH at a cafe and went in search of a hotel. One place was kind enough to show us a room. We went to the fourth floor and a chambermaid met us. She said "room". We nodded. She took us to the door, pointed, and left. The door was locked. I don't know if this counts as showing us a room, but she was nowhere to be found. We had some trouble with the fire escape, but made it out mostly undetected.

We were cold, wet, tired, and cranky – always an excellent combination. M. and I decided that we were going to get in the car, drive north, and stay in the first hotel we came across that had a restraint nearby no matter how sketchy it seemed. That is how we ended up at Hotel Diana. It had a pool/large cement round bowl full of rain water and scum. It had communal bathrooms. It had a bathtub with a shower head laying in it. It had shower curtain rings with no shower curtain. It had beds/cushions on platforms. It was a Communist horror. It was clean and dry though, and the restaurant was across the driveway.

Have you ever had one of those moments when you walk into a room and everyone looks you up and down and knows you do not belong there? We have.

National Security

Thursday we rented a car and drove south toward Cesky Krumlov. We stopped off at an ammunition factory on the way. I don’t know how many of you have toured an ammunition factory, but let me give you a couple of tips.

One: if it is in a foreign country, do not send the guy who doesn’t speak any of the language to talk to the guards. The guards will then follow him to the car with their big guns and make the situation very uncomfortable.

Two: do not make jokes about national security or act too interested in which government defense contracts they have. It is not felt to be funny.

Three: bring your own safety gear. Even though the signs say that eye protection and ear plugs should be worn, they might not be given to you. Your ears might ring for an hour or so.

Four: do no stand too close to the belts, particularly if they are jerry-rigged.

Five: the bullets are hot when they come off the press and sticking your hand in the big box of them is a bad idea. That should cover it.

After the tour we continued south to Cesky Krumlov. It was by far the prettiest town I have seen the entire trip. It puts Prague to shame. It’s a medieval town on the World Heritage list or some such nonsense. Practically, this means that the roads are exactly wide enough for one economy car to get through. The charm more than made up for the narrow streets. We dubbed this ‘the pretty town’.

We stayed at my favorite hotel of the trip here. It was adorable. James had a little trouble with the doors trying to scalp him a few times, but that was the only flaw. The bathroom had a bidet – the first one M. had ever seen. There are a whole fleet of stories that go with that, but we have agreed to keep them between us.

Beer is cheaper than water

Most of you know that I do not like beer. I have never cared for the taste or smell of it. Czech beer has changed my mind. There are multiple reasons for this. First, I am cheap. Beer is cheaper than water, Coke, juice, milk, and every other drink on the menu, so I drink beer.

There are several pubs where beer is all you can order to drink – sometimes only one kind of beer. The culture around beer drinking here is fascinating too. A specific toast ‘na zdravi’ is said, everyone clinks the mugs together, taps them on the table, and then drinks. It never fails.

My favorite beer here, Kozel, doesn’t taste at all like beer. It’s sweet, not bitter, not overly carbonated, dark, and delicious. It tastes more like bubbly water with chocolate and coffee flavors. I have no idea why they do not export this beer to the U.S., but James assures me it would be not nearly as good if they did. Thus, I have amended my dislike of beer to a dislike of American beer.

It is still crap.

Mining towns

Wednesday we made a day trip to Kutna Hora, a mining town east of Prague. We caught a bus and an hour or so later pulled up at the station. James had a whole trout for lunch. We offered 50 crowns for him to eat the eye, but he wouldn’t take it. I don’t blame him. I probably would have a put a piece of lettuce over it during the meal though. It freaks me out when my dinner is watching me.

We toured Saint Barbara’s cathedral, then went to the ossuary in Sedlec. It was decorated with the bones of over 40,000 plague victims and pilgrims. It was also seriously creepy. Grabbed some snacks at a local grocery store. They have onion, ham, steak, and paprika flavored potato chips. The steak ones are surprisingly good. We went back to the bus station and spent an inordinate amount of time figuring out which bus would take us back. We managed to pick the bus that took the scenic route. I think we went through every small town between Kutna Hora and Prague. I am quite aware that buses need to fill up occasionally. However, I have never been on a bus full of passengers that pulled off the road to fill up in the middle of the route until this trip.

Cleaned up at the hotel, then back to Wenceslas square to meet up with Dan, a guy we know from Prague that visited the U.S. last year. He took us to a pub near my first hotel that had decent food, large portions, and excellent beer. We went for a drink afterward at a pub up the road. He talked the waitress into selling us a couple of the Pilsner glasses. Walked back to the hotel and headed to bed - we had to get up early for our road trip.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

These Boots

Had an excellent lecture on pediatric orthopedics today. I feel my learning was enhanced by my outfit. Today I am wearing my tough-girl boots I picked up at one of the vintage stores here. I like to think the previous owner wore them in the revolution and resistance against Communism. They have kicked some KGB secret police butt in their past. Scoliosis doesn't stand a chance against these suckers.

After lecture, caught a bus to Melnik, home of one of the oldest wineries in Bohemia. (I like to call the Czech Republic Bohemia too. It sounds so earthy.) Toured the chateau and the wine cellars from the 1300's. It blows my mind sometimes the sheer age of this country. The first castle was built in the 900's. Isn't that incredible? This vineyard was established by Emperor Charles IV. I don't recall what he was emperor of exactly, but good call on the grapes Chuck.

The bus ride was an hour of fun. I spent ten minutes arguing with the lady about my student status for ticket discounts I know I'm getting old (Happy Birthday honey!!), but I think I can still pass for under thirty. Especially since I am under thirty! I won after pointing out that no professional adult would be wearing butt kicking boots in the middle of the work day. I also had a student ID card. Shared my aisle with a couple of chickens in a cage. Before I would have questioned this, but now I know about the egg thing.

I also finally understand why the Czech people immigrated to Nebraska. It looks exactly the same. Rolling hills, farm plots, strips of trees around houses, and a bar every mile and crossroad. I still don't get why people immigrated to Minnesota. You would think they would have veered left when the winter came. Lewis Black does a great bit on that. Google it.
Sampled some wine, had a fantastic early dinner of pit roasted venison, quail, and dumplings. Caught the bus back and am getting ready to go out with Russian Julia and crew. Finally talked them into taking a night off from studying. They take this being a doctor thing WAY too seriously. I will Americanize them one by one.

One more thing -

Happy Birthday DH!!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Should I stay or should I go

For those of you wondering, I won The Battle of The Sheets. The final skirmish involved some tactics not covered under the Geneva Convention. My lawyer advises I not discuss it further.

It was my turn to get grilled in lecture today. I have found that it's much easier to remain calm when one is focused on translating instead of the actual question being posed. He had me describe some hardware and its uses. I nailed it (pardon the pun). I also learned a lot about their techniques for repair of intertrochanteric fractures today. It was a really interesting morning. I am still having trouble with the non-antiseptic style. Doubt that I will get used to that.

Huw and Faris (I apparently spelled their names wrong before) showed me a new way home from the hospital. They are both just darling. Anyway, it turns out I can ride one of the trams most of the way there. This is very exciting as it cuts my commute way down. So I bid them goodbye and was cheerfully riding the tram back to the hotel and listening to NPR.

Suddenly, a screeching noise came from up ahead. Everyone was thrown forward. I pulled my earphones out and looked around. All around people were grumbling and picking up their bags. The doors remained shut; the tram wasn't moving. Interesting.

We sat there for five minutes. The grumbling increased. The conductor came stalking through and made a rapid announcement in Czech. Half of the people wordlessly moved to the front of the tram and disembarked. The other half didn't move.

I feel compelled to point out that my Czech at this point consists of about ten phrases, none of which are appropriate to ask what is going on. I futilely try English. Spanish. Nothing. I should point out that the two halves were about equal- genderwise, weightwise, agewise, package holding-wise. My imagination took flight, as it is wont.

Are we too heavy for the track? Were the heavy people supposed to get off? Did all the Czechs get off and now the train of evil foreigners will be blown up? Was there a selection process for who left? What if I met the criteria and now everyone is stuck because I didn't get off? Is this like a movie and we're teetering on a cliff and one wrong weight imbalance sends us over? Am I in Speed 5?

I decide that I will be better off outside of this death trap. None of my scenarios had anything pleasant for the people left on the train. Alone, I head up the aisle to disembark. The passengers eye me as I go by. I am sure that I am about to be lynched.

I made it! Freedom!

Now as it turns out, one tram had broken down and then been rear ended by another causing a jam. This is much more logical than any of my explanations. However, my imagination did not go to the most logical explanation. Instead, it went to the most absurd. I'm sure this says something deep about my personality, thus my plan is to ignore whatever it is saying.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Day 2 in the hospital

Julia took me to get a metro pass for the month today. I attempted this on my own yesterday, but got nowhere with the lady behind the counter. Julia, with her alternating cajoling and demanding Czech got much further. There was one small snag in the plan. They needed a passport size photo to put on the pass. Now while I am undoubtedly vain, I don't regularly carry around wallet size photos of just myself. I do carry around wallet size photos of my family.

M., thanks for sharing my genes.

Lecture this morning was in Czech, but I followed a great deal of it. They work much more on the "pulling student in front of class and drilling until embarassed" theory of education here. It went pretty well for me.

Hip replacements are a little different here too. The implants are essentially the same with the cups being slightly different. Also, they are doing elbow replacements - they only work for 3-5 years before failing due to fracture, so I'm not sure of the indication, but there they are.

Clinic is different too. Washing hands is a rarity, hand sanitizers are seen as often as leprechauns (note: they do not celebrate St. Patrick's Day here), and they spend two to five minutes with each patient. On the positive side, I'm at the nicer hospital, all patients strip down upon entering the room (gownless! Drapeless! Take that PAS and OSCE's!), and no one complains about the wait.

I'm looking for vintage shops this afternoon. Wish me happy hunting!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Hablas Cesky?

Lost seems to be a permanent condition of mine. Big surprise to those of you who know me well, I'm sure. Woke up late this morning, threw on my doctor clothes, ran downstairs, grabbed a kolac (poppyseed, blech), and hopped on the tram.

Going the wrong way.

Shoot. Hopped off the tram, got on another, made it to the metro, got on the green line. This would have been fabulous had I needed the green line. I needed yellow. Finally got on the right metro and made it to the hospital. I was an hour late.

Now I have seen some big medical centers- Baylor comes to mind. This place could have eaten them for a mid-morning snack. My instructions were "go to the orthopedics department".

There were seven orthopedic departments. NO ONE spoke English. Heck, I even broke out Spanish and a smattering of sign language. No go. I see a sign for Foreign vsitors ( that is not a typo). "Hooray," I think,"someone will speak English." Ah, optimism. You get me every time.

They did not speak English. Ricky Ricardo had a better handle on it. I made it through three of the departments before I found a friendly face.

Her name is Julia. (She's blonde and nice just like my other Julia at home). She's a fourth year medical student here, which is the same as a first or second year in the U.S. She's Russian and thus gorgeous. I also met two guys from London, Farris and Hugh, also in her year.

We have decided to trade talents. They don't know anything about physical exam, diagnosis, or reading xrays, and I know nothing about getting around here. I think I'm getting the better end of the deal frankly.

Another positive about this place - the students only work from 8 until noon. Seems like a much more civilzed arrangement than we have at home. The students all wear jeans and long white coats. I was overdresses in my slacks and sweater. Better luck tomorrow.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Lost, International

Slept in this morning until 9, which I think is 2 am back home. I'm convinced that thinking about the time difference will drive me crazy, so no more of that. Breakfast was kolacs and cream- very good.

Headed out to buy my month metro pass, got lost, found out nothing was open on Sunday including metro pass selling kiosks, got more lost, wound up in Stare Mesto. Saw the astronomical clock put on its show. I think it says a lot about the history of Praha that one of the evil people on the clock is a Jew (now beardless to be more culturally sensitive). The clock is beautiful though, and the buildings here are amazing.

The manners still leave a bit to be desired, but I have no doubt I will eventually win someone over. It will be a domino effect - bringing down grumpiness one Central European country at a time!

On another note, all of the websites are in Czech- including Gmail, Facebook, and Google. This posed a bit of a challenge when I was attempting to chat with DH.

Tomorrow is my first day in the hospital. Wish me luck...and a spare Babel fish if anyone has one. Habla ingles anyone?