Should I stay or should I go

For those of you wondering, I won The Battle of The Sheets. The final skirmish involved some tactics not covered under the Geneva Convention. My lawyer advises I not discuss it further.

It was my turn to get grilled in lecture today. I have found that it's much easier to remain calm when one is focused on translating instead of the actual question being posed. He had me describe some hardware and its uses. I nailed it (pardon the pun). I also learned a lot about their techniques for repair of intertrochanteric fractures today. It was a really interesting morning. I am still having trouble with the non-antiseptic style. Doubt that I will get used to that.

Huw and Faris (I apparently spelled their names wrong before) showed me a new way home from the hospital. They are both just darling. Anyway, it turns out I can ride one of the trams most of the way there. This is very exciting as it cuts my commute way down. So I bid them goodbye and was cheerfully riding the tram back to the hotel and listening to NPR.

Suddenly, a screeching noise came from up ahead. Everyone was thrown forward. I pulled my earphones out and looked around. All around people were grumbling and picking up their bags. The doors remained shut; the tram wasn't moving. Interesting.

We sat there for five minutes. The grumbling increased. The conductor came stalking through and made a rapid announcement in Czech. Half of the people wordlessly moved to the front of the tram and disembarked. The other half didn't move.

I feel compelled to point out that my Czech at this point consists of about ten phrases, none of which are appropriate to ask what is going on. I futilely try English. Spanish. Nothing. I should point out that the two halves were about equal- genderwise, weightwise, agewise, package holding-wise. My imagination took flight, as it is wont.

Are we too heavy for the track? Were the heavy people supposed to get off? Did all the Czechs get off and now the train of evil foreigners will be blown up? Was there a selection process for who left? What if I met the criteria and now everyone is stuck because I didn't get off? Is this like a movie and we're teetering on a cliff and one wrong weight imbalance sends us over? Am I in Speed 5?

I decide that I will be better off outside of this death trap. None of my scenarios had anything pleasant for the people left on the train. Alone, I head up the aisle to disembark. The passengers eye me as I go by. I am sure that I am about to be lynched.

I made it! Freedom!

Now as it turns out, one tram had broken down and then been rear ended by another causing a jam. This is much more logical than any of my explanations. However, my imagination did not go to the most logical explanation. Instead, it went to the most absurd. I'm sure this says something deep about my personality, thus my plan is to ignore whatever it is saying.